gosh, it feels like i'm not writing for couple years..hahahaha...

my life has been so busy yet FUN lately! i've never thought that i could have all of this..i've never imagine how's God would let me have all of this..i have my job now..me as the boss. me as the worker. and me as the money receiver.
HOORAAYY!!
and i've never knew that what will be my job is my dream since i was a little girl. i wont called myself as a fashion designer -at least for now- cause i havent that pro yet at all..i'm still learning, i'm still searching, and i'm still amateur..but i will and i always learn to make myself bigger and bigger..i still have a dream of having my own little boutique..and it still a long way to go..
am glad now i have a job where my mom support me..-since i always have a rejection if i wanted to do some job bfore-
am HAPPY for what i am now and it just more than words can say or wrote..thanks God thanks God THANKS GOD..for made me as a person that has been walk through the past..

i have five dresses to finished for next month, 12 tambourine dresses for xmast event in karawang..and what i excited the most is, am gonna make an evening gown for my bestest friend ever, PHI...hahahahaha...

but the sad things are, i still have me as the moody and lazy person..and that's totally drive me insane when i had my bad mood, i cant do anything, while the deadline is getting near...huuff!
how can i manage myself..why does it just so hard to do to push myself harder?

actually i still have some stories, but since i have to finish the 4 dresses on 19th Nov, i have to stop writing now...wish me luck!

and once again,
THANKS GOD for letting me wake up every morning realize and know that i have a job that i've been dreaming on before...thanks to You..

once said that people would never feel enough...
and that's true...
very TRUE...
coz i never feel enough..even good things or bad things..*hahaha*
but for this time i just never feel enough if i only thanking God and feel blessed for i have in my life..esp. for everyone i have..

my family..
first of all, my DEAREST mom...she has an endless strength to face the life and to keep all of her children live and move on forward..i never imagine if my mom has any of my characters..maybe us *her children* will end up being homeless jobless and of course wont be able to finish our study at all..thx God, for He has give us wonder woman..nothing compare to her..nothing, and NO ONE...
my lil sister, the person who keep me insane yet keep me on the track where i should be..she's totally more mature than me, and always give her best advice when i lost in my sadness and madness..she's the one who can be so much fun yet sucks in the other time because she never be able to decide anything better for her life...hahahha..but that's the way we share our care...exchange any advice in any terms and conditions..hahahaha..

my 'other' family..oOnta's..
they are definitely IRREPLACEABLE...
i feel so goddamn LUCKY to have them in my life..they always care and love me..try to give back my lost smile when i feel that i'm so useless..they always support me..
suddenly my friend, lucie, tagged me in a photo at fb, she tagged me as a loveable person...and i asked her why did she tagged me as a loveable person? and simply she answered, "because everyone totally busy set up a surprise party for you while the other was never had that!"
at that time i was shocked..*well, not kind of that shocked* i was shocked how lucky i am..and this is the idea which has made me want to write now..

it will never ever enough if i only thanking or feel blessed..coz nothing compare to them...
it's more than words can say, more than an act can do, and more than anything..
maybe all i have to do just stop complaining and have a better life! *just like phi always said*
and hope that i wont dissapointing them..

lately,
i realized that i smile A LOT!
hahahahha...and it feels GREAT..and the strange thing is, i dont know why but i feel i'm in love with no one..hahahahah..crazy as it heard..but i would take it easy, coz someone said to me, "a woman looks most beautiful when she falls in love"
so, hope that i will looks beautiful now..
hahahahah..

anyway,
THANKS A LOT GOD!!

jadi cerita bermula kmaren saat gua bener2 ga mood ngapa2in..bosen..sejujurnya merasa kehilangan teman2 di hari bahagia gua..hahahahah..trus pulang les juga gua malah ga pulang..ijin ngerjain tugas les d kost tmn les..trus siang nya k IP sama ninuk dan louise..lumayan mengobati kehampaan hati..*najis lebay banget sih gua* hahahahha,,trus pulang les juga djemputnya telat sm si ko tanto..sampe rumah nongkrong d depan komputer..trus gua berencana mau mandi..pas baru masuk kamar mandi dan siap2 mau setor boker, si mama ngegedor2 kamar mandi panik sendiri ktnya kebelet juga dan gua diusir keluar..keluar kamar mandi gua malah dsuru bukain pintu depan..dan pas gua buka pintu, teman2 tersayang dan tercinta udah ada d dpn pintu bawain tiramisu buatan mereka *dan kevin* sm kartu ucapan segede gaban..hahaha...trus gua dsuru tiup lilin dan saking exciting nya gua lupa make a wish...geblek abis,,tp gpp Tuhan pasti tau apa wish gua dan mana yg terbaik buat gua..hehehehe..nah entah itu ide dari siapa gua dapet lilin yg ga mati2 mu dtiup sampe kapan juga kl bara nya masih ada,,,sialan..tambah monyong deh gua..trus itu kartu ucapan segede gaban dkasiin k gua..trus gua dapet set bedcover baby milo!senaaanngg..ahirnya punya seprei monyet..hahahahah,,,
trus kita smua pada makan tumpeng yg udah dbeli sm si mama...hendy semperti biasa mengambil porsi paling pertama dan paling banyak...hahahahha...eh sebelomnya lucie ngasi piagam buat gua,,,ktnya peresmian gua naek pangkat dr pembantu jadi anak tiri..hahaha..si kevin diangkat jadi pembantu buat gantiin gua..hyahahahah,,,
trus udah nya kita keketawaan sperti biasa..senang rasanyaa..udah lama ga ngumpul segini lengkap..*walau emg ga selengkap2nya yah,,masih kurang mela, anuz, kevin, puput..*
trus kita foto2 deehhh.. senang rasanya punya kalian semua dalam hidup gua...ga pernah terbayangkan sm gua bisa punya kalian sebagai penyemangat hidup gua..pendorong hidup gua...slalu support gua..selalu berusaha mengembalikan setiap jengkal senyum gua kembali...and all i know is, YOU ARE MY PRECIOUS GIFT FROM GOD..and you are so irreplaceable..

*dedicated to: bocel-beo-kevin-vianna-cindy-ester-lucie-shirley-irwan-hendy-aldi-puput-mela-seli-adrianus-danang-devi*

happy birthday to me!!
hahahaha...

ulang taun kali ini terasa sangat biasa menurut gua sih...serasa tidak ada yg spesial..dari jam 12 malem kmaren gua malah berusaha meningat2 apa aja yg udah terjadi dalam idup gua 22 tau sebelom ini..taun lalu apa yg gua lakuin pas gua ulang taun..dan taun2 sebelom nya lagi..

pagi ini dimulai dengan pegi les dan mampir dulu k IP buat beli selusin donat j.co buat para penghuni tempat les..gua malah lbh seneng menghabiskan waktu d tempat les krn gua bisa dapet banyak tawa di sna ketimbang d rumah..dan teman2 gua pun nampak sibuk dengan urusan mereka sehingga gua jg ga terlalu banyak mengobrol sm mereka kecuali kebodohan2 yg kita obrolkan d komen foto facebook d pagi hari..hahahahah...

malem gua pegi k nanny's pavillon sm mama, ko tanto, dan seli buat makan malem..sama terasa plain nya..sometimes i miss my dad so much..he didn't even notice that today is my birthday..there's no sms or a phone call...where are you dad?
but, never mind..it's been 10 years already without his greeting juga...keep smiling..=)

let's do some flash back as much as i can..
taun lalu gua umur 21..apa yg terjadi saat gua ulang taun yah..jatuh pada hari minggu...hari sabtu nya gua pergi bersama oonta unutk arisan dan ntn the mummy..dan bersama erick juga..hahahah...setelah sebelomnya pas tgl 1 agustus kita banyakan pegi k waterbom PIK juga..dan sebelom nya lg gua abis ribut gede sm erick..dan malam seudah pulang ntn he gave me a little surprise...kado nya kalung yg dia simpen d bawah jok mobil nya...trus bawain kue kecil sm lilin...hahahah..lucu nya..miss that moment..it's still funny that whatever he had done to me he still can make me smile with all those sweet memories..hahahahah..sudahlah,mari kita lanjutkan flashback nya...





2taun lalu gua umur 20..apa yg terjadi yah..hmm..teman2 tercinta memberi surprise d rumah..most unforgetable moment i guess...hahahah..pulang ujian sore2 sampe rumah d sambut dgn konverti d dpn pager..trus ada jalur yg dbuat dari lilin..dan saat sy jalan mereka ngebanjur pake aer seember..huahahahaha..trus udah nya makan2 d pagoda...ah senangnyaaa..kangen kalian semua kawan....gua tidak bisa menemukan foto2nya d komputer gua,,,yg ada cuma ini....















ah kangennyaa..skarang udah 22taun..tanggung jawab bertambah yah berarti..huff..gambatte nee...
segini dulu aja,,besok gua mu lanjutin lagi setelah gua mencari file gua ulang taun dari taun ke taun..hahahaha..
nites all..
and once again,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!
may God always be with me through this year,,
AMIEN..